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An Open Letter to Stefan Poag, Artist of Raping & Shitting Scenes

September 28, 2011

Whoa.  Bam.  Hey big boy, lemme just tell you… message received.

LOUD & CLEAR!!!

Backstory for everyone: Stefan Poag, artist who revels in sodomy & big dick rapes & lovely mosaics, just blew my doors off.  I can’t even link to his website, he did such a crazy gymkata kick to my dome I don’t want people who haven’t seen it to think even less of me.  He outed me, outed my work, tossed me into the light for everyone to see my true identity.  Thank you for taking it easy on my kids, those li’l guys mean everything to me!  Bullseye, you got me good.  Called me for the Nazi that I am and then rolled up his big-kid sleeves and laid into me with his bully-beaters.  I am Dresden and Stefan Poag, butt violation artist and also he draws pooping and maybe farts (?), is Captain America flying low in a B-25 and he also liberated Auschwitz.

‘Hero’ is a word that is over-used these days, but Stefan Poag — artist of murder, cocks, and baby murder and Mines of Khunmar — you are a SUPER-HERO (all-caps intentional).

Daaaaamn.  I traveled halfway around the world to escape the scathing light of your Cuthbertian fire and you still found me.  You migrated to WordPress even, to dickpunch me in my own house.  I’m probably going to quit blogging after this.  If you go ahead with your threat to put your art on my stuff and sell it yourself, I will definitely quit… so I guess my future is in your hands.

Please, treat me gently.  At the end of the day, I always thought we were mates… please don’t do a mate wrong.  You have proven that you are the premier bully-stomper on the worldwideweb.  Be satisfied by that, don’t print my name and that I live in Vietnam.

I like your art, can you mosaic me a swastika or a Sarah Palin portrait?

40 Comments leave one →
  1. JRT permalink
    September 28, 2011 6:54 pm

    [back from vacation, still tedious]

  2. September 28, 2011 6:56 pm

    I enjoy making fun of myself as much as the next guy (maybe more). You wrote some very nasty things about me in last year – things I hope my children never read.

    But they were just words. How people actually live is what matters.
    I forgive you.

    • September 28, 2011 7:47 pm

      Hahaha, awesome… so I got that going for me, which is nice.

      You ever gonna come clean about what happened at your previous church?

      • September 28, 2011 8:22 pm

        The retired pastor I replaced gathered a group of family and friends to have me voted out on the charge that I am a “liar, munipulator and just plain evil.” I resigned so that my family would get two months to move out of the parsonage. During those two months, the retired pastor became increasingly abusive and many church members left fearing he might become physically violent. He even tried to break into the parsonage through a basement door when my wife was home.

        It is a real shame too because the church was growing so rapidly (attendance was up to around 90 from the 30’s when I started there nine months earlier).

        Not nearly as exciting as the possibilities you speculated, but still a terrible ordeal for my my familiy.

      • September 28, 2011 8:46 pm

        Sounds like a real life ‘Against the Cult of the Reptile God.’

        Well bubie, as far as religious whackos go you’re not too bad — I hope the Prophet Mohammad keeps you and yours safe. Just please, no more clones.

  3. kellri permalink
    September 29, 2011 1:38 am

    Hey there mister anonymous…Stefan’s full of shit and so are you. If you really do live in Vietnam then get your lying ass in gear and meet me down at Chili Pub so I can show you up close and personal how we do things over here. Otherwise I’ll just assume you’re another basement dwelling pussy (all lips and no cock).

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 4:19 am

      I love ya, Kellri, but threats of violence toward basement-dwellers issued over the Internet are a clear indication that the threatening party is also a troglodyte–or a middle-school teacher. Who cares what these dipshits say, or whom they claim to be? I find this stuff mildly entertaining, but come on…

    • September 29, 2011 5:50 am

      Okay bitch, I’m here. Jesus this place is a fucking dump… track-marked ladyboys and pisswater booze. Yuck, I’ll wait around one more hour but that’s it…

    • September 29, 2011 8:03 am

      Vinh the table boy says “how you do things over here” is with a rugby player’s cock in your mouth and your kids watching, so I’m gonna pass. I’m outta here.

  4. sup poag. love your blogs. permalink
    September 29, 2011 5:52 am

    this username is an extremely subtle way to imply that poag is ydis, hth

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 6:17 am

      That’s a theory, certainly. They both seem to be obsessed with matters scatological.

  5. kent permalink
    September 29, 2011 10:54 am

    kellri, you wouldn’t put a good word for me at K&KA like a good fellow? I know some of the aunts there miss me. If you do eulogize me I will hold off telling you what I think of you until I start a thread there.

    YDIS, are we to assume you didn’t link to Inspector Clouseau because your IP address is too revealing or just that it would prove you are not in Vietnam?

    Clouseau, ydis is not the type of lad who could keep a straight face or a civil tongue amongst all the aunts at Knights Knaves & Aunts.

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 12:58 pm

      Yes, the K&KA grannies are having quite the ill-informed discussion of the topic at their pathetic little tea party. Now some are advocating criminal prosecution for Poag over the “photo”. Lamebrains.

    • September 29, 2011 1:07 pm

      ***psst! You guys want to have a little fun? Poag is chasing IP ghosts because his comments are open to guests — anyone can post as anyone, same as here. I assume Kellri posted to Poag’s blog as me, or maybe posted as one of the posters here that Poag thinks is a sockpuppet. Not sure, but could it be any fucking funnier? So go to Poag’s blog and post as me or Maliszewski or Zak S or President Obama or Michelle Bachmann or Poag himself, just put in whatever name you want and their website and WordPress creates a nice little link. Enjoy!***

      • Radovarl permalink
        September 29, 2011 3:15 pm

        Okay, did that.. But,

        Better yet.. Let’s all openly admit our real names and forum handles. No one will ever believe us…

      • Roger Moret permalink
        September 29, 2011 3:51 pm

        Ok Rad, I’ll bite. I’m really Mike Mearls.

      • JRT permalink
        September 29, 2011 6:50 pm

        [i said the same thing 293 times]

  6. Timothy permalink
    September 29, 2011 10:57 am

    Limpo has totally freaked out. Now he has a picture of Kellri’s avatar being executed, Viet-Nam style. Citing Godwin’s Law at the same time he accusing others of being nazis, and he is just standing up to them, no matter how unpopular it makes him…you’re right Dungeon Suk Boy, he is a true Hero.

    Maybe a weekend with Alexis would make him lighten up?

  7. Roger Moret permalink
    September 29, 2011 11:33 am

    On Poggy’s Bloggy:
    “What I don’t understand is your motivation — but maybe trying to understand it is an exercise in futility. Do you identify with the posters like Roger Moret and Timothy and FASERIP who chime in on every thread you start at YDIS? Because if those dudes were my blogging cronies, I’d probably kill myself in despair over the kind of people who are attracted to my banner. I’d rather be alone than find myself in such company.”

    I don’t know about Timothy and Faserip, but I dont think suicide is the answer to associating with us, maybe masturbation, drinking and self flaggelation? Unless you are a no-talent art type with conspiracy theories who is bong-water nuts.

    What was the over/under on the Pog meltdown? I think I won the pot, guys. I only hope the Tao von Dao meltdown is half was entertaining, but Alexis, Gawd help him, may be made of tougher stuff.

  8. KenHR permalink
    September 29, 2011 12:23 pm

    Poag is such a narcissist.

  9. September 29, 2011 1:14 pm

    I would like to thank everyone here for making this obscenely-titled column the #2 result when you Google ‘Stefan Poag Artist’. I don’t often have something positive to say, but you’re good people!

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 2:44 pm

      That alone is worth the blow to my self-esteem by showing my “face” here :).

  10. kent permalink
    September 29, 2011 1:33 pm

    Let’s get back on track here taking the piss out the Knights and Knaves and Aunts.

    Are there anecdotes out there which cast these dotes in a mocking light, extra laughs for dope on the admins? [By the way, if there are admins reading, I would like to make a comeback to share my thoughts on Gary Gygax’ Dungeons & Dragons game]

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 2:46 pm

      Getting the urine out of the matted fur of that pack of mangy old dogs would… oh, that was an English idiom, wasn’t it..? I’ll see what I can do.

  11. kent permalink
    September 29, 2011 3:46 pm

    OK, I’ll go. Here’s one about T Foster being a hypocrite:

    On the YDIS thread at the Aunts and their Aunt-like Nephews forum T Foster first says:

    “”I find it amusing that the same guy who “outed” Kellri as being YDIS just a few weeks ago “outed” somebody else (DungeonDelver) as being YDIS, and between the two managed to accuse us of deliberately disabling his account here in order to “silence” him (even though he admits he changed the email address associated with the account). Surely there’s got to be a three-strikes rule for publicly expounding demonstrably false conspiracy theories?””

    Minutes later he says:

    “”I maintain my position that the only person who could possibly be willing to devote so much attention to James Raggi’s every move and utterance is James Raggi himself. Anybody else, anybody who actually disliked Raggi as much as YDIS claims to, would realize that giving him that much attention and free press (and always dutifully including links back to his blog) is having the opposite effect — increasing his exposure and “buzz factor” and keeping him from fading into well-deserved obscurity.””

    Since we know that Raggi is not YDIS lets just say that’s one strike for T Foster for “expounding a demonstrably false conspiracy theory”. Notice how he gets a dig in at poor Raggi who has nothing to do with this fusstroversy and is just trying to make a living producing material for a game he loves in land far away. T Foster is not fit to be a moderating Aunt.

    • Radovarl permalink
      September 29, 2011 4:15 pm

      How do we know that Raggi is not YDIS?

      • kent permalink
        September 29, 2011 4:31 pm

        Language, character and IP address.

        As far as I can tell their writing styles are wholly distinct. YDIS is an outlier, very few can write like that in the way that very few would think of smearing peanut butter on the *inside* of their underpants.

        Raggi is self-obsessed to the point where he could not understand why anyone would write so much without basking in the acclaim in a very public identifiable way.

        The above is mere opinion (or expert judgment call it what you will) but in the third place I know what city YDIS was living in until a month ago.

      • JRT permalink
        September 30, 2011 5:59 am

        [still boring]

  12. Fuckwit permalink
    September 29, 2011 4:47 pm

    Would that be Dublin, Kent?

    • kent permalink
      September 29, 2011 5:35 pm

      Dublin is in Ireland. You’re thinking of Paris, Texas.

      • Flaming Flambeaux permalink
        September 30, 2011 2:54 am

        There’s likely a Dublin in Texas, also. No Irish, lily-livered liberals, nor commies need apply.

  13. JRT permalink
    September 29, 2011 5:59 pm

    [i will try for better stuff to say]

  14. September 30, 2011 8:54 am

    No you aren’t.

    • JRT permalink
      September 30, 2011 1:12 pm

      [no entertainment value here]

  15. FASERIP permalink
    October 1, 2011 5:53 am

    Stefan Poag is an IRL Joesky.

    @ JRT: Have you cornholed Gail yet? You might as well; given her age, the front’s as bad as toast without butter.

  16. JRT permalink
    October 1, 2011 6:05 am

    [i hate myself most of all]

  17. JRT permalink
    October 1, 2011 6:08 am

    [this was boring]

  18. JRT permalink
    October 1, 2011 6:11 am

    [touch my button]

  19. JRT permalink
    October 1, 2011 7:12 am

    [i am a retarded]

  20. Ian Warner permalink
    October 4, 2011 2:47 pm

    [still here]

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