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Kill These People

October 26, 2010

Awww, isn’t this ADORABLE!!!  It’s like Highlights for roleplaying gamers:

(insert your own piss-take here)

“Goofus was late to Nerd Sunday because he lost track of time while watching gay cowboy porn, eating a dolphin-unsafe tuna sandwich, and prank-calling the Pakistan Flood Relief Telethon.”

“Gallant calls ahead to ask Christian if he should bring doilies for everyone’s sodapop cans!”

That’s right kids – don’t bring any bacon to your games, or the host might shit out a kidney.  Goddamn, and of course there’s DiceSpunky in the comments soiling his GoBots undies over this smelly diaper of an article.  Make sure you check out the rest of the site and click on all their spammy little ads and affiliate banners… all this friggin’ rad content is supposed to be the spur that gets you to BUY BUY BUY!!!

15 Comments leave one →
  1. October 26, 2010 4:32 pm

    It would have been nice if they would have suggested not upper decking your host’s toilet when your character gets killed. That’s not easy to clean up…so I’ve heard.

  2. Jack Colby permalink
    October 26, 2010 5:20 pm

    Why is it that RPG players keep bringing up this social contract BS, and always feel the need to spell it out explicitly? There are plenty of similar social activities adults engage in where no such specific contract is ever brought up. Is it because there’s such a huge number of douchebag RPGers or what?

    • Marlboro McKenzie permalink
      October 26, 2010 6:54 pm

      @Jack Colby: Douchebags. I’ve pretty come to the conclusion that the stereotypes exist for a reason and the bulk (all pun intended – lots of gamers a fat asses) of RPGers are complete social retards.

  3. Tony permalink
    October 26, 2010 6:53 pm

    @ Christian – that’s some funny shit.

    @ Jack – There are some real dick gamers out there. I just about flipped a lid when a new gamer came into my house as a test run.
    – First he thought is was ok to go rummaging through my fridge and pantry. I let that slide…
    – I let that slide right up to the point that he asked to use the bathroom. When he was taking a REALLY long time, my wife went to check on him. That mother fucker was snooping around my 5 year old daughter’s room! He was escorted out of the house right there.

    So yeah, I can totally appreciate some upfront gaming rules.

    As an aside, I didn’t really see any Buy/buy/buy ads. That site looks nice and clean.

    • October 26, 2010 7:12 pm

      Get your fucking glasses checked, Tony. That picture of horsies on the right is an ad. A little below that is an Amazon affiliate link to Deathwatch. The tabs at the top – one is a store, the reviews include affiliate links to purchase the product they just reviewed, the ‘Steal This’ section includes affiliate links to purchase the various gaming systems for their crap content, ‘Gaming Tools’ contains yet more links to partner sites with shit for sale, RPGNow banners are scattered throughout various pages, etc.

      Tony you must work there and you’re here to defend the shield, otherwise you are a complete fumbledick…

  4. Tony permalink
    October 26, 2010 10:09 pm

    Hey dumbass. have you LOOKED at the site? It looks nice, and is on par with just about every other worthwhile gaming blog. You must like it so much, you’ve checked it out completely!

  5. October 27, 2010 1:33 pm

    I read the article, and certainly can see why it would enrage anyone who read it.

    • October 27, 2010 1:38 pm

      PS And I think you made the right decision to not comment in the original article. Those guys seemed pretty tough.

      • October 27, 2010 3:11 pm

        *chomp-chomp*

        *burp*

        What? I’m eating a carrot, can’t hear anything…

  6. October 28, 2010 5:01 am

    No, you can hear, you just can’t listen.

    • October 28, 2010 1:48 pm

      *munch-munch*

      It’s cereal now… Corn Chex… seriously, don’t fuck with me while I’m eating.

      • October 29, 2010 11:07 am

        Step 1: You pretend to be eating.

        Step 2: ?

        Step 3: All agree that you have bested me in a battle of wits.

  7. October 29, 2010 3:10 pm

    The battle’s not over until you hit me with some of your sweet-ass puns. I await, terrified and eyes averted, with the back of my hand trembling against my brow…

  8. October 31, 2010 6:56 am

    Personally, I’m just frothing with rage that these douche’s thought that “Stuffer Shack” was a good name for their RPG resource suckhole…

  9. Remkad permalink
    November 11, 2010 10:52 am

    Really Blair? Really?

    Before you go around bashing other people, why don’t you first figure out how to spell? I can’t go one sentence on your Planet Algol “website” without getting a headache from your glaring incompetence.

    Oh, and way to jizz all over yourdungeonissuck. The two of you should get a room. There you two can laugh at the world while your parents cry about where they went so wrong. You two must make them proud.

    You are such a loser.

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